Accepting Yourself

In yesterday's post, I talkled a little bit about how when it comes to how you present yourself and your appearance, you can do whatever you want, but you should do it with your own best interest at heart. Part of doing that comes from accepting yourself. If you can look in the mirror after a shower, with your dripping wet hair and freshly cleaned face and truly feel good about yourself, hey you're doing better than I am that's for sure. There's something about getting out of the shower and looking in the mirror that I hate from the bottom of my heart. In that moment I see every red blotch on my face with the background of white porcelain tiles that seem to make them redder and blotchier and stand out a whole hell of a lot more. I see the fat hanging from my gut from that extra piece of cake I should not have eaten last night. I see the whiteness of my legs, lacking the sun kissed glow as if I was a ghost or hadn't ventured outside in the past century. It's not a fun moment for me.

Sure, I've had the days I'm really feeling myself and I find myself feeling confident and occasionally even sexy while getting out of the shower, but those days are few to many in the mix of the more common uncertainty and embarrassment. You're so vulnerable and unprotected in that moment. Wet and naked. No baggy sweatshirt to cover my stomach, no makeup on my face, nothing. That is precisely why I use that moment to gauge my current self-confidence level.

Finding that moment in time or place for yourself can be difficult, but worth it. This concept may seem way out of the ordinary to you but listen here: when I sit there and criticize myself, I take note of the first thing that comes to my mind. I take that and I work on it. Maybe I'll go to the gym the next day if one day I notice my belly. Or lay out in the sun for twenty minutes if it's my white legs. Whatever it is, the whole concept is self-improvement for the self. I noticed I didn't like how I looked so I did something about it for myself.

Once you've gotten yourself to the point where you are at complete self acceptance, that's when you've got it right. 

Appearences

A woman's appearance isn't an easy topic. But I didn't start this blog to write about the easy topics. Appearances are such a touchy subject, and there's ladies out there that are passionate at both ends of the spectrum (one end being the anti-makeup "come as you are" gals, the other being beauty pageant status every day), but I think there's a lot of us out there that fall somewhere in between.

I think it's perfectly okay to fall somewhere in the middle. If you truly want to try out a new YouTube tutorial every day and walk around looking like you just stepped off the runway, hey, go for it. I am by no means trying to stop you. In fact, I admire you for the effort you put into yourself. However, I am also not discouraging those girls out there that would rather go out without a lick of makeup on. Honestly, more power to you if you're like that. I can only hope for the self-cofidence you have one day for myself.

For us "in-the-middle-ers" it's a tricky balance, our appearance. Every morning when I wake up I put a different amount of makeup on and do my hair a slightly different way. Whatever I feel like that day. Sometimes it means foundation and eye makeup and everything in between with flat ironed hair, sometimes it just means eye makeup and hair down, other times it may mean no makeup at all accompanied by a pony tail. Same with my outfit that day. If I feel like wearing leggings and an old oversized sweatshirt that day, then that's what I'm going to wear. If I want to wear a sundress and heels, guess what? That is what I am going to wear. And hey you know if I feel like doing a full face of makeup and wearing sweats, that's what I'm going to do. I'm all about doing whatever I want to do, but I do it for me.

Like I've said a couple times now, I really have no problem with makeup and how much one person uses on a day to day basis. What I do have a problem with is someone using makeup, or a lack thereof, for someone else's happiness. If you like to wear makeup but the new guy you're into says he's more into "natural" girls, don't change for him. Makeup is a great tool to boost your self-confidence, not to cater to his likes or dislikes. Believe me when I say if you start dressing a certain way or wearing your hair and makeup a certain way for anyone other than yourself, it will start to feel like a chore.

Do what you want, but do exactly that. What YOU want. That's when you'll get it right.